Saturday, March 13, 2004

[sorting out]

long time no blog. guess not really in the mood. don't really know what to write.. past 2 weeks was full of ups and downs. so yar, just can't really be bothered to blog. to my blog readers.. sorry!

however, yesterday was an important day! nj had a half day. wasn't really a half day coz in the end need to go for bio pract and did the horrible bio pract test. i was drawing stuff that i don't see in the microscope. and pretending that i saw it. I had great imagination huh. oh well.

I m feeling so down on thursday night. coz i had a terrible trg. i don't understand how can anyone be that unreasonable. and for that, i m suffering physically. and when you are tired physically, everything else just goes wrong right? His mood is like the funny weather these days. unpredictable. i don't deserve doing those push ups and sit ups. and poor viv was already in tears. cheer up girl! stay strong. i kept telling myself i won't cry for such matters.

I know i can't blame anyone for that. It's my choice, my life, i have to live with it. and who is going to pity me? obviously no one eh. So i asked for it myself, so i should know what i m into. I shouldn't be complaining. It hurts.This doesn't just apply to rugby, but almost everything in my life now. I gave up complaining. Sorry to my friends.. i know i've been complaining a lot. thanks to those who are willing to listen and giving me support. No thanks to my parents. they just don't understand me..or either that they are too busy to even care.or either that i just don't like the way they are showing concern for me. it's too passive. and no thanks to some of my friends. maybe they just don't understand what i m going thru. some are really not helping me. i'm left struggling by myself. trying to figure out how i should tidy up my life now. i've to get rid of trash.

oh, what was happy was yesterday i got to spend time with josh. finally had the time to. both of us so busy and everything. sorry yea. finally sorted some stuff. it just feels good to slack away and have fun together and forget about school, and everything else for the moment. oh and i baked brownies on thursday, slacked after training.! i think quite zai for first timers man. yikkes and i met pple that i shouldn't. haha.sorry about the ultra big reaction. i need to brush up my bowling skills. i sort of lost it! how can that be. sharks ! had a great dinner and dessert. best ways to relieve stress!
thankyou!
i ended my week nicely. yeah!!!! cheers =)

jyf going kite flying. and if i don't go tmr everyone is going to ask why. yar, i'm not taking As. i m not having common tests. i don't have a competition next week.how i wish yea.

okay. going for dinner. long day tmr. i dunno how am i going to sort my life out. slowly is the way man.
give me some time. i promise it will be neat again.
and the least you guys can do is to pray for me.

shystar*;
x 3/13/2004 09:17:00 PM