Friday, September 03, 2004

[lost sheep baa baa]

Today is the last day of school. I felt so disoreintated. all the lessons were like changed and the teachers didn't even like inform us properly. lectures were cancelled and everything/ without even informing us. yesterday i was in school just for an hr lesson. and i was in the lib the whole day. felt so drained then. everybody like ponned a lot of lessons, so i was getting sian and tired. everyone like so pia and everything. i just don't like the atmosphere. they have all the right to pia all the like. i'm not gg to be affected.

josh fell sick yesterday. he had a fever.. so weak! kae, glad that he is feeling better after i visited him yesterday. hope it was a pleasant surprise. yeah, i think i feel kind of lost without him in school. it's just different. suddenly someone who has always been beside you just like disappeared. lost.. like a lost sheep. this feeling is scary. it's empty. not that i don't like my friends or anything, in the end i still hanged out with almost all the cliques in the class today. think i'm too dependent already, such that just parting a while makes me lost. i feel so vulnerable. i don't feel independent at all. always thought i will be a able to survive alone...like how i survived rugby alone... but today proved that i don't wanna be all by myself.. i can't be all by myself...

shystar*;
x 9/03/2004 11:04:00 PM